Posted by: Amanda | January 18, 2011

What will I join today?

I have a condition. After years of suffering from this condition, I have decided to name it Joiner’s Syndrome. Everything that comes along, I want to join: clubs, groups, websites, programs . . . It usually happens something like this:

A friend: “Hey, did you hear about thisreallycoolsitethatilovethatyoushoudllovetoo.com? It’s awesome and free.”

Me: “Oh, wow. That sounds really amazing. I’m going to join.”

And, then, I join. Moments, hours, days, maybe even a week go by, and I no longer remember the username or password or the email I used to sign up. Sometimes, I’ll spend a half hour trying to recover my log in. Sometimes I’ll join a second time.

The problem with Joiner’s Syndrome is that it rarely occurs with Actually Do It Syndrome or with Committed to the Core Syndrome or even Finish It Already Syndrome.

Something I finished: the Danskin in 2005.

Over the years, I’ve started many things: writing works, craft projects, organization efforts, dietary plans–you name it, I’ve probably started it. But the endings elude me. Or, maybe instead of the endings eluding me, I’m actually running away from the endings. Instead of making resolutions, I decided that 2011 is going to be about finishing things. So far this year, I’ve made myself finish one big project (such as redoing the master bedroom in my home) before switching to another (reorganizing the kitchen pantry) in the same general life area.

In the past, I’ve found some kind of ill comfort in leaving behind bushels of half-started work. Now, I’m embracing the art of the ending. I want to find a new peace there.

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